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Jason slips into the cabin, shaking, looking for Gabriel.


But all he finds is a note.

He stares at it, going numb. Drops to the couch, the note slipping from his fingers to float back down to the coffee table. Sits there, trembling for several minutes, his mind racing. Finally looks up, his voice soft, scared.

"Lil?"

Listens carefully, finally realising that he's alone in the house. Slips from the couch to the floor, his whole body shaking, tears in his eyes. Closes his eyes against the darkness of the house, her words, Raina's words washing over him. Some part of him agreeing with her, that Gabriel didn't need him, didn't want him, that he was nothing more than a fun fuck.

Stands, picking up a glass that's sitting on the table and throws it against the wall, the sound of shattering glass breaking the silence. He stares at it, shaking.

Clenches his fists, swaying a bit, trying to force everything down, to be strong, trying to push away the images in his mind. Of Raina and Gabriel, everything from the past and present mixing together. Stumbles his way to the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet before he pukes. Stays there, hunched over the bowl until there's nothing left to come up and the dry heaving stops.

Slowly moves back against the wall, pulling his knees up and curling into a ball. The tears start slowly until soon he's sobbing, shudders running through his body as he rocks back and forth, saying Gabriel's name over and over.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 07:50 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
He didn’t want to be rude. And he wasn’t sure if Jason was dressed or not, being in the bathroom. Hearing his name, Jason’s voice. Hope. His weight shifted silently, a hand reaching for the doorknob.

“…..C…C-can… Are… Are you decent?”

Date: 6 Jul 2005 07:53 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
He doesn't move from where he's cuddled up with Dru and lets out a harsh laugh, trying to sound normal.

"I'm never decent."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 07:56 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
That strain to be normal. He knew that. He’d heard it with Emma a million times recently. Hand curled over the knob, turning it to slowly open the door. Head peeking in, same saddened face… The red results of tears. The man filed in quickly, forgetting about the door. Knees thunk to the floor, legs around one of Jason’s own as he wraps his arms around him. He didn’t know much else on how to help. How to comfort. He’d always been an affectionate man. Even to his friends.

Adam pulled back, eyes doing a quick check for cuts or other damage… They took to Jason’s gaze.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 07:59 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Jason stiffens in reaction to the hug, being pulled from Dru. He quickly grabs her hand, barely remembering not to squeeze to tightly. Meets Adam's gaze for a few seconds then looks back down to the floor.

"W-why are you here?"

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:00 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theywhispertome.livejournal.com
"Princess brought him. He was frightened for you." She holds onto his hand, moving closer, doing her best to be a comforting presence. "Princess heard you crying."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:05 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Sniffs and leans against her, shaking.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:02 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
The question stung some, but the pain drowned itself in his demeanor. The good father. The good friend. He tilted his head, standing slowly to the sink. Cool water poured from the faucet, his hands searching for a clean towel or washrag. He tried his best to be strong. To not cry himself. Tears were contagious.

“B-Because it’s what friends do… They help each other… And you, Jason, need a friend right now…”

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:04 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Jason shakes his head, clinging to Dru.

"I need to forget, I need it all to go away."

He looks at the floor, shaking.

"I can't be strong like this."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:08 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theywhispertome.livejournal.com
Dru strokes his hair and murmurs soft, comforting nothing-words, holding him close.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:08 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
He finds a towel, wetting it down with the cold liquid flooding from the faucet. After the water stops, and the towel is worked out, wrung out so just the soothing dampness and cool feel is left. Adam offers it to Jason.

“That’s a lie, Jason. You’re strong. Hell… You’re strong ’nough t’ get Emma t’ flush the shit she had. More than I could do.”

He lowers to him, hand still offering the towel.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:12 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Jason takes the towel, staring at it.

"'m not. I need to be strong for them. For Gabe and Leela and Emma and the pard. Can't be like this. I need to forget."

More tears fall, but he ignores them.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:15 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theywhispertome.livejournal.com
"Forgetting doesn't make it better. Forgetting takes away part of your self."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:17 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Softly.

"It's killing me, Princess. She's killing me, even when she's dead."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:18 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theywhispertome.livejournal.com
"I can make the hurt go away, but I won't take the remembering."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:16 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
He whimpered silently, scooting over beside Jason. His hip nudged his accidentally. A hand touched his shoulder, wanting to give in and hug. Boys don’t hug. The thought flashed in his mind. His fathers voice booming. No. Jason. Jason needed his help.

“Hey… Need to forget what? What’s so tragic that you have to give up those memories?”

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:20 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Voice still soft, thinking over Dru's answer.

"Raina. Need to forget Raina."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:22 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
“Dru’s right, Jason. Taking Raina’s part in your life away is not going to take this hurt from you. You’ll be taking more than just her away. What about Gabriel? What about…”

He frowned, saddened. His body shifted, arm hooked around his back, thumb rubbing his shoulder. He wasn’t this way. He knew only a bit of what Anna had told him about Raina

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:25 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Looks back and forth between the two of them and then curls up again, crying.

"Make it stop hurting, please."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:26 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theywhispertome.livejournal.com
Drusilla rests her palms against Jason's temples. There's concentration, and Drusilla shakes, but she doesn't let go of Jason. And then she slumps a little against him.

"All better."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:29 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
There it was. He had to keep Dru from falling, and he had to keep Jason from breaking. A hand touched Dru’s arm softly, the man shifting to his knees. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to help. No manner of hug would cure Jason right now. Not from him. He whimpered, audibly this time. He was at a loss. All Adam could do now was wait until something pushed him to make another move to help.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:32 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theywhispertome.livejournal.com
Drusilla hugged her knees. She'd taken Jason's pain into herself, but Drusilla had spent centuries in pain, she would cope.

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:41 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Slowly stands with Dru, leading her to the couch in the living room.

"Thanks Princess, I have no way to repay you."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:32 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewolf-inside.livejournal.com
Jason opens his eyes, staring at Adam, blissfully numb.

"...this is ...weird."

He looks around and blinks.

"Emma..."

Looks up at Adam.

"Leela's place is across the lake, that's where they are. She's going to need you. I'll take care of Dru."

Date: 6 Jul 2005 08:38 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adamdouglasjr.livejournal.com
He nods, taking Emma over anyone any day. Love proved too strong to ignore her need, especially for him. It was odd, seeing such a sudden change in emotion. His world had no magic, not the kind that didn’t require wires and mirrors and smoke. He stood, not without patting Jason’s shoulder, making sure he was, in fact going to be alright. Feet swiftly took off, heading for the directed place for Emma. Emma. That was all that was on his mind now…

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Jason Schuyler

December 2006

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