(no subject)

[thewolfinside]

Jason is sprawled on the couch, watching the only channel he has memorized, The Cheerleading Channel, while waiting for Emma.

Comments

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

Sighs, releasing Jason and rolling over onto this back.

"When?"

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Sits up and turns, looking down at Gabriel.

"After this is over. When it's done, when you're back together, I'll fall apart then."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"No. I can't... Can't do that to you, pup.'

Hooded eyes staring up at Jason, looking pained.

'I'm the alpha here. I'm the one that has to keep it together. And putting this on you is killin me, kid. I'll... I'll figure out how to handle it. I'll make it. I'm a survivor, kid. You know that."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

"I don't remembering offering any choice in the matter."

Shakes his head, frowning.

"How the HELL are you suppossed to handle anything when you're trying to keep from shooting yourself in the head? Explain that to me."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"You know, I haven't thought about that in days... But when you put it like that...'

Twisting, slipping off the bed and fighting not to pace.

"Maybe it'd be a better sitch for everyone is I did. I mean, one less burden for ya right?"

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Stares at the bed where Gabriel was laying, body tense.

Quietly. "Not funny."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Lil's in jail. I... I fuckin raped Leela and yer on the verge of a breakdown.'

Whimpering softly, dropping down to sit on the edge of the bed, head in his hands.

"I'm blowin it, kid. Big time."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

"Lil's in jail because she was fucking stupid."

Doesn't look over, doesn't move.

"You're not. And everything thing else is being fixed."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Tell me whatcher thinkin.'

Demanded not asked, still hunched over, eyes closed.

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Doesn't answer, just sits there, staring at the bed.

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

Shifting, turning to face Jason. Hand gentle but insistant on his arm, yanking him closer.

"Answer me, pup. Please."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Shakes his head, pulling away.

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Nope. Don't think so, kid. Not how love works. Come 'ere."

Taking him by the hand, insistant yet gentle.

"Love works by you actually havin faith in me, and yerself and in the fact that nothin is gonna fuck this up for us."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Lets Gabriel pull him closer, shaking a bit.

"I do have faith in you."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

Laying back down, pulling Jason with him. Holding him tight, nuzzling at his cheek.

"Now, please? Answer me? What's got ya so tied up in knots, pup?"

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Takes a bit to answer, when he does, his voice is very quiet.

"I'm scared, tired."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Scared of what, pup?"

Asked softly, stroking his hair.

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Starts shaking, closing his eyes.

"Losing."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

Frowning, hand caressing down Jason's back.

"Yer winnin, kid. Raina's gone. Yer free. You have yer pard. Yer ahead of the game, pup."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

"Losing you."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Ah, Jesus, pup..."

Sighing, hugging him tightly.

"Didn't I tell ya? I might run my mouth but I ain't goin nowhere."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Sits up, staring at Gabriel.

"How the hell do you know? You don't know what's going to happen when Emma does whatever the hell she's going to do. I just..."

Trails off, still staring at Gabriel.

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Take em. The knives, the rifle. All of it. I don't give a damn what the fuck I see, how I feel... I can't kill myself. Trust me... I've fuckin tried."

Trembling, eyes closed tight.

"And I didn't have you the last time I tried. I... I can't fuckin leave you. I've tried.'

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Laughs, sounding a bit hysterical

"I'm more worried about them breaking you."

Stares at Gabriel, a bit shocked.

"When?"

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"It was... It was when things first seemed to be going from fucking to dating. When I realized it wasn't just heat and need and lust and that I was fallin for ya. Knowin I had made that promise and couldn't have ya and...'

Letting the words trail off, trying to figure the best way to say it.

"I... I went back to my St. Louis. Was gonna go back to my life. I stepped outta the nexus portal, felt my heart break and came back."


Biting at his lip, looking over Jason's shoulder.

"Alright. I can't promise that. I can't say it won't. But.. .I have ever reason in the world to survive it, pup. And I'm lookin at it.'

Eyes shifting, unable to stop his smile.

"And if that doesn't win me the cheesy award... But I mean every word of it."