(no subject)
14 September 2005 09:14![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thewolfinsideJason sat curled up in the corner of the playset, head still resting on his knees. He'd barely moved since the evening before, having been unable to sleep because of the nightmares. He knew the others were checking up on him, they kept the backdoor open and one of them came out to check on him every half hour or so.
Even Sin had been roped into 'Jason Watch'.
Betsy had called him several times, but he ignored the call, letting it go to voicemail each time. He knew she was upset with him after last night's session, but he wasn't doing what she wanted. Not now, maybe not ever.
Even Sin had been roped into 'Jason Watch'.
Betsy had called him several times, but he ignored the call, letting it go to voicemail each time. He knew she was upset with him after last night's session, but he wasn't doing what she wanted. Not now, maybe not ever.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 14:49 (UTC)Burying his face in Gabe's neck, clinging to him, his words muffled.
"She wasn't going to let me come home."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 14:53 (UTC)"Don't ever let her in the same state with me, pup.'
Tones low, deadly.
"I'm not playing games with you and I anymore. We come first. Our life. Us. You and me and Ella. Then Scud. Reno. The rest. Us first."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 14:59 (UTC)"She was worried, thinks I'm going to do something, even if I don't mean too."
Laughs harshly, wiping at the tears.
"She wants to put me on a fucking suicide watch."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:03 (UTC)"Are you? Suicidal?"
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:16 (UTC)The words whispered, scared. Of himself, of Gabe's reaction. Rocking a bit, his arms wrapped around himself, holding tightly to his shirt.
"Can't sleep because of the nightmares, stupid thoughts in my head because I can't stop thinking. I don't plan on it, but she thinks I would hurt myself without realising I was doing it."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:21 (UTC)Moving, sliding so that he could look Jason in the eyes.
"What have I done? What isn't being done? What do you, YOU, Jason Schuyler, need?"
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:31 (UTC)"You left, in the dreams. They told you the only way to keep from killing me was to leave and they wouldn't let you out until you agreed to leave me. And you left and the others went with you, all of them. And I was alone again."
Shaking visibly, he shrugs, looking away.
"You can't do anything, it's in my fucking head. Depression and shit."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:37 (UTC)"Do I seem that strong, Jason? Take this as fucking bad as it sounds but I would almost rather kill us both than voluntarily walk away from you."
Yanking Jason to him, cuddling him close.
"We can do this, dammit. We can. Us. Baby, please, tell me we can."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:38 (UTC)no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 15:50 (UTC)"Do you have faith in us, baby? In me?"
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:02 (UTC)"You. I have faith in you."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:10 (UTC)Smiling, realization hitting him.
"It's simple. We need to decide what we need to make us happy and trustful and how to get it. At one point? That was killing Raina. She's dead. Now what?"
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:19 (UTC)"I have faith in you, it's myself I don't trust."
Shrugs, looking toward the house.
"Be happy? Have the pard happy? I don't know."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:25 (UTC)Snapping out the words, growling.
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:44 (UTC)"sorry."
Unsure what he's apologizing for, just saying it.
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:49 (UTC)"Fuck."
All of the wind leaving his sails, looking small and weak and scared.
"Don't say sorry, baby. Say you wanna try."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:54 (UTC)His voice hoarse, breaking as he speaks.
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 16:58 (UTC)no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 17:12 (UTC)Wraps his arms around Gabe, crying again, shaking his head and whispering between sobs.
"Need you, can't... Don't leave me, please don't leave me."
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 17:15 (UTC)Snarling out the words even as he clings to Jason, holding him tight.
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 17:27 (UTC)Whispering the words over and over as he cries himself to sleep, his body finally giving in to exhaustion.
no subject
Date: 14 Sep 2005 17:28 (UTC)"I don't deserve shit,' he whispers to him. 'I have exactly what I want. You. Dammit, baby, get that. I want you. Love you.'