(no subject)

[thewolfinside]

Jason is sprawled on the couch, watching the only channel he has memorized, The Cheerleading Channel, while waiting for Emma.

Comments

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Nods, drops his hands and head, laying his head against Gabriel's shoulder.

"One step at a time. We get to that point and we'll deal with it then."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

Wrapping his arms around Jason, slumping.

"Why are you doing this? Don't give me that love shit. I know you love me, pup. What I don't know is how love makes you able to look at me.'

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Lays there, fighting back the tears.

"Because I know how much you regret what happened, how much you wish you could change it."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"I don't deserve you, kid.'

The words murmured softly, canting his head to nuzzle into Jason's hair.

"If I believed in god, I'd thank him every day for ya. Remind me to be human, pup. Remind my why it's worth it."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

"Yes, you do."

Sighs, nodding.

"I'll remind you constantly."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Is... Is she gonna be okay?' Nodding toward the door, fingers slowly combing through Jason's hair, sliding down his arm and moving to take his hand.

"Hadn't meant to hurt her.'

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

"Emma will be okay. She's already headed home."

Lays there, eyes closed.

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Talk to me, pup? Please?'

Fingers lightly twining with Jason's, his other hand smoothing his hair back from his brow.

"Tell me whatcher thinkin."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Shakes his head, then leans into Gabriel's touch.

"Trying not to think. I don't want to think right now."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"So worried about you, pup.'

Refusing to worry about himself. Too many others.

"Ya got yerself into hell. Yer the only one here that doesn't need an alpha, you choose to have one and you get straddled with me. And the trouble kids.'

Smiling at that, stroking that silken mane.

"If you ever cut yer hair like Nathaniel? I"m so spanking you."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Doesn't look up, listening and trying to keep from shaking.

"Nothing to worry about. I'm fine."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Do I lie to you, pup?'

Asked softly, eyes hooded, searching Jason's face.

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Shakes his head, clenching his hands. Winces at the pain and looks up at Gabriel.

"Don't... not now. Please."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

Both hands gently taking Jason's face between them, holding his gaze, meeting his eyes.

"So you aren't fine.' Stated, not asked. 'When do you prefer? When Scud wrecks his bike? When I'm a basket case after the punisment? When Lee shifts? When? When do you want to be honest with me and rely on me like I keep relyin on you?"

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Looks at Gabriel, going numb as he speaks.

"After Emma... Just after, okay."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"No."

Stated softly, flat, shaking his head.

"I can't live with that, pup. I can't live with you bein there for me every time I fuckin slip, every time I screw up and yet... You ain't willin to give me the same."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Turns away, looking at the ceiling.

"Yes. Who's going to take care of everyone while you're recovering from... Dammit Gabe, I'm your second, I'm not allowed to fall apart."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"And there are those that would say that the alpha can't either. But I'm damn fuckin good at it.'

Growling, hand grabbing Jason's jaw, trying to bring the wolf's gaze back to his.

"Who's gonna take care of you, Jason? When the fuck are you gonna stop bein the tough guy and suck it the fuck up that you aren't alone, that you have friends and that you have a lover that wants to see ya happy and healthy. Not bottling shit up and pretendin yer fine while lyin to my face."

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Allows Gabriel to turn his head, not saying anything.

"I know I'm not alone, and I know you want me happy, but right now I can't fall apart. I can't."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Do you trust me?'

Asked softly, almost innocently, calmly. A serious question.

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Blinks, nodding.

"Yes."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"As your Alpha? Your friend? Your lover?'

Fingers loosening, stroking back Jason's hair, staring into those bright blue eyes.

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Confused, staring at Gabriel.

"Yes."

[lion-passant.livejournal.com]

"Then why won't you trust me with your pain?"


Asked softly, leaning down to tenderly press his lips to Jason.

"Why can't you let me in?"

[thewolf-inside.livejournal.com]

Closes his eyes for a moment, then looks at Gabriel again.

"I do and I will."